Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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