You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize
