Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
dude. I can hear the air.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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