apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
The adults are the big ones right?
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
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