you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
Even my vagina gasped.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
Randomize
