where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
