turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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