This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
