alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
