She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
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