I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.