I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize
