You work out of a Hotel?
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
