I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
