he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
