Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
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