i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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