Taylor Swift is so right about you.
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
