East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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