He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize
