I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
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