you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
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What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
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Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Randomize