it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize
