ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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