Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Randomize
