So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
