I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
You may now shotgun with the bride
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
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