I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize