dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize