mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
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