ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
She talked about nothing but beanie babies for 45 minutes. I'm never getting high with her again.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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