He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
