Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
