so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
wakey wakey hands off snakey
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
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