I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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