the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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