What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
If you were wondering whether I accidentally FaceTime called the undergrad who works for me in lab during a particularly graphic blow job last night, then the answer is yes.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
