i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
