covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
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My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
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