so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
