Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
