I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I think I sprained my soul last night
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Randomize
