Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're not piercing ourselves today.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
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