he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
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Had sex to a Lionel Richie song. I have a feeling I was conceived to it. Finally reached full circle.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
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I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize