NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Randomize
