i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I got her a Nickelback box set.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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