Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
