I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
