i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize
