I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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