its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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