The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
he shaved USA in his pubs
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
I need to calm my uterus...
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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